Today, I turn 41. 41 years, 2139 weeks, 14974.9 days I’ve been on this earth. 41 years living, breathing, using up the resources. Have I made it worth it? Should the Mother earth be glad of me or will she be happy to see me go? Hopefully that will many years from now. Have I done enough for Earth? For the other inhabitants of this earth? And then I say, “Screw the other inhabitants of this earth. Have I done enough for me?”
Have I done enough to ensure my own comfort, my own place in history. To ensure that when we are old and gray, we’ll not go hungry. Will there be enough money to keep us comfortable? By we, I mean my husband, my cats and myself. I don’t know if I really care about the history thing. I mean if I wanted to leave a lasting impression, I would have had children. Right? Instead, I have 6 cats and 4 or 5 unfinished novels. (Warning, tangent coming).
Speaking of unfinished novels, that’s what I want to do. I know it now. I know it like I know that I love beer and mexican food. I have waffled for ages about what I want to be when I grow up. I want to be a writer. I don’t want to write important, life changing books or THE GREAT AMERICAN NOVEL. I just want to write books that people want to read.
Okay, back to turning 41. I’ve done pretty well for myself. I have saved several cat lives and a few dog lives. 87+95555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555 (speaking of, Jackie wanted to say something). We recycle. We eat local and organic. I use litter made from corn, which is about to get even more expensive. We don’t consider our clothes disposable. But are doing enough? I try to conserve energy. Although my husband might tell you that I’m just cheap and hate to get a big utility bill. I try to consolidate shopping trips to use less gas. I would do this even if gas were super cheap. But is it enough?
Wow, have I actually said anything? I think I just needed to rant for a few hundred words. Turning 41 will do that to a gal.